The things that plagued me

So, looking back, what where the things that plagued me? For my mind is trained is escapism, and once I've been hurt by something, although unresolved, I grow layers of protection around it, bury if from my conscious mind. Hence, these topics are hard to discuss without being a bit removed, but them again, in hindsight, things sometimes appear clearer, precisely because they have lost their vivid color and stinging sharpness.

• The issue of love. The unspoken convention of a particular love, that I have yearned for so much, but never felt of convincingly witnessed. This removal was, or is still, painful, and I compare it to a loss of faith that a religious person might undergo.
• How I was so tangled up in the end of my high school days, in having to inevitably choose one of two mutually exclusive and mutually renouncing mindsets, both of which would be a loss of reality, truth, or beauty. In hindsight, I may have simply been captivated by the incommensurability of people's, or one owns, experienced worlds. The great distance between minds, and mindsets, and particularly the automatic loss of these experiences accompanying the transition of time.